Like You....We Put Kids First: November 2012

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About.com Teen

Your teen will need privacy. As parents, we are not very comfortable not knowing what is going on in our child’s life. But as your teen starts to date, you will need to take a step back and not try to know ‘everything’.

See our quiz, Are You Sabotaging Your Teen's Social Life? You may at first have a hard time and feel like something is wrong. That is normal – your parenting role is changing. Change always feels awkward at first. On the other hand, your teenager may want to chat about the experience. He/she may have some questions to ask. If so, make yourself available. But remember to try not to ‘read into’ any of the questions and begin prying.

Communication Tips

You can’t accomplish anything if no one is listening. Communication is the cornerstone for a positive relationship with your teens. Here are a few tips to start opening the lines of communication.

• Build Trust– When you give your opinion or ask your teen questions their first reaction is you don’t trust them.

Build trust early. Show trust by giving them some age appropriate freedoms. However, make it clear that if the trust is broken, freedoms will be taken away until the trust is rebuilt.

• Practice Honesty- At this age, adolescents develop their thinking skills. They are very aware of what you say and are sensitive to consistency.

If you say something and do another, they will recognize your actions as two faced. By being dishonest you will lose their respect and your ability to lead.

Every Day Parenting Tips

The first step is opening the lines of communication. Once that is accomplished, you should be better equipped to deal with the everyday issues that arise. Here are a few tips to build a positive framework.
• Encourage Activities for Personal Growth- Teens maintain a better attitude when they participate in activities allowing for personal expression. Extra curricula activities like art programs, sports or band help teens find value in themselves. Evidence has also shown teens who participate in community service engage in less risky behaviors and receive higher grades.
• Allow Teens to Have a Part- time Job It will teach them important skills for the future such as accountability, time and money management, the ability to communicate effectively and be on time.
• Build a Close Relationship– Remember, communication is key. Teens are persuaded by the people they spend time with the most. By spending time, parents contribute the most powerful impact on a child’s attitude, behavior and life approach. Form close bonds by making family dinners a time to connect. Talk to your teen about issues that are important to them such as school or their friends. Resist the urge to be a know-it-all. Instead, actively listen to their opinions and reflect what they are saying back to them so they are aware you value their thoughts. Teens with a close bond to their parents are proven to do better academically and engage in less destructive behavior.

Thursday

Dating: Do's and Don'ts (1949) - Teen Dating Educational Film

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