Like You....We Put Kids First: BOY MEETS GIRL

How does a fellow get to meet a girl he likes? This a question many boys ask. Girls who have to use subtle approaches think a boy has no real problem in this direction. But what a boy really wants to know is how to operate so that his advances won’t be rebuffed.

Traditionally, a boy asks a mutual acquaintance to introduce him to a girl he wants to meet. He takes it from there, usually with an invitation to a date that will further their acquaintance.

In modern settings it’s not always easy to find a go-between. Fortunately, today it’s no longer necessary. If a boy and girl attend the same school or classes, or belong to the same club, which in itself constitutes an introduction. If Janet goes to a different school, then Ted can try attending one or more of her school’s functions in an effort to meet her.

The hardest moment, perhaps, comes when a couple is finally face to face. If a boy is an outgoing type of person to whom friendly pleasantries come readily, then it’s easy. He’ll find the right little compliment to pay a girl, the right opening remarks. But the shy, inexperienced boy—and he is legion—will find these first efforts at gallantry very trying. Such a boy ought to plan ahead of time just what he will say to a girl. Even then he may not follow through with his plan; tension may erase every rehearsed word from his mind and he may end up blurting out an abrupt invitation that startles the girl. But if she is sensitive and interested, she overlooks his clumsiness and encourages him with her acceptance, knowing that experience will take the rough edges off her new friend’s manner.

Meeting a strange girl in a strange place can really give a boy stage fright. This time he had no chance to rehearse; suddenly he’s expected to do and say the right things. It’s no wonder that he gets tongue-tied. (Of course, later on, in long solitary post-mortems, he can think of the most brilliant, most witty conversation.) That’s why it’s a good idea for beginning daters to develop a few little formulas to use when words fail.

A good opener, for instance, would be: “Didn’t I meet you at the Joneses?” Or a boy might make a comment that linked them to a common friend or interest. He could also ask a girl where she hails from, what brought her to this place, how she spells her name, or how long she has known the person who introduced them. Such simple little icebreakers that get the conversation rolling are worth developing.

Look for upcoming blogs that deal with teen dating, as well as wonderful books your teen will enjoy to enhance their dating experience. Click here to order your eBook on Teen Dating and receive a free eBook on Teen Weight Loss.You can also order other books on parenting and teen problems and solutions on this site as well.

For Our Kids Parenting and Co-Parenting Services understand your concerns. Our teen parenting class will provide you with the knowledge, tools and skills needed to parent effectively. You will receive parenting tips on dealing with angry and troubled teens, teens dealing with stress and depression, as well as other issues facing our teens. We also provide great resources on parenting books and referrals, as well as lessons on how to co-parent, your teen when living separated from the other co-parent.

Whether court ordered, or in need of basic parenting skills, this class is for you. Call to register now at 1- (757) 327-0481. We will be happy to assist you through both education and life experiences. Email us at: forourkids1st@aol.com. Visit our blog at: http://forourkids1st.blogspot.com. Need some one on one training? Chat with me at: http://imlive.com/waitingroom1ms.asp?hostnick=AskLinda

About.com Teen

Your teen will need privacy. As parents, we are not very comfortable not knowing what is going on in our child’s life. But as your teen starts to date, you will need to take a step back and not try to know ‘everything’.

See our quiz, Are You Sabotaging Your Teen's Social Life? You may at first have a hard time and feel like something is wrong. That is normal – your parenting role is changing. Change always feels awkward at first. On the other hand, your teenager may want to chat about the experience. He/she may have some questions to ask. If so, make yourself available. But remember to try not to ‘read into’ any of the questions and begin prying.

Communication Tips

You can’t accomplish anything if no one is listening. Communication is the cornerstone for a positive relationship with your teens. Here are a few tips to start opening the lines of communication.

• Build Trust– When you give your opinion or ask your teen questions their first reaction is you don’t trust them.

Build trust early. Show trust by giving them some age appropriate freedoms. However, make it clear that if the trust is broken, freedoms will be taken away until the trust is rebuilt.

• Practice Honesty- At this age, adolescents develop their thinking skills. They are very aware of what you say and are sensitive to consistency.

If you say something and do another, they will recognize your actions as two faced. By being dishonest you will lose their respect and your ability to lead.

Every Day Parenting Tips

The first step is opening the lines of communication. Once that is accomplished, you should be better equipped to deal with the everyday issues that arise. Here are a few tips to build a positive framework.
• Encourage Activities for Personal Growth- Teens maintain a better attitude when they participate in activities allowing for personal expression. Extra curricula activities like art programs, sports or band help teens find value in themselves. Evidence has also shown teens who participate in community service engage in less risky behaviors and receive higher grades.
• Allow Teens to Have a Part- time Job It will teach them important skills for the future such as accountability, time and money management, the ability to communicate effectively and be on time.
• Build a Close Relationship– Remember, communication is key. Teens are persuaded by the people they spend time with the most. By spending time, parents contribute the most powerful impact on a child’s attitude, behavior and life approach. Form close bonds by making family dinners a time to connect. Talk to your teen about issues that are important to them such as school or their friends. Resist the urge to be a know-it-all. Instead, actively listen to their opinions and reflect what they are saying back to them so they are aware you value their thoughts. Teens with a close bond to their parents are proven to do better academically and engage in less destructive behavior.

BOY MEETS GIRL

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