Like You....We Put Kids First: OVERCOMING BASHFULNESS

Shyness with members of the other sex is common among young people. You are not alone in this problem. Getting over self-consciousness to the point where you can relax and be friendly with those you most admire is a challenge. The more thrilled you are in the presence of the other person, the more likely you are to be embarrassed, it seems. But, with experience you gradually become more comfortable with the opposite sex. Then, as you develop poise and self-confidence, you discover and put into practice more and more on the art of dating. How to develop that poise and confidence is the question.

Since girls grow up sooner, and are ready for dates before boys of their age and grade generally are, a particular problem for a teenage girl is how to get a bashful boy to notice her. This is why girls’ clubs so often center around planning boy-girl activities. Many a shy boy has come out of himself at a well-planned party. With encouragement, he finds that he can carry on a conversation and have fun in a mixed group.

OFF TO A GOOD START

Soon he, too, is ready for dates, usually first with the girl who was friendly and approachable while he was getting up his courage to ask her.

A fellow needs to be reasonably sure a girl wants to go out with him before he asks her. So it’s a girl’s responsibility to let a boy know that she is interested in him, without behaving so boldly that she scares him off.

Look for upcoming blogs that deal with teen dating, as well as wonderful books your teen will enjoy to enhance their dating experience. Click here to order your eBook on Teen Dating and receive a free eBook on Teen Weight Loss. You can also order other books on parenting and teen problems and solutions on this site as well.

For Our Kids Parenting and Co-Parenting Services understand your concerns. Our teen parenting class will provide you with the knowledge, tools and skills needed to parent effectively. You will receive parenting tips on dealing with angry and troubled teens, teens dealing with stress and depression, as well as other issues facing our teens. We also provide great resources on parenting books and referrals, as well as lessons on how to co-parent, your teen when living separated from the other co-parent.

Whether court ordered, or in need of basic parenting skills, this class is for you. Call to register now at 1- (757) 327-0481. We will be happy to assist you through both education and life experiences. Email us at: forourkids1st@aol.com. Visit our blog at: http://forourkids1st.blogspot.com. Need some one on one training? Chat with me at: http://imlive.com/waitingroom1ms.asp?hostnick=AskLinda

Until next time……..Linda

About.com Teen

Your teen will need privacy. As parents, we are not very comfortable not knowing what is going on in our child’s life. But as your teen starts to date, you will need to take a step back and not try to know ‘everything’.

See our quiz, Are You Sabotaging Your Teen's Social Life? You may at first have a hard time and feel like something is wrong. That is normal – your parenting role is changing. Change always feels awkward at first. On the other hand, your teenager may want to chat about the experience. He/she may have some questions to ask. If so, make yourself available. But remember to try not to ‘read into’ any of the questions and begin prying.

Communication Tips

You can’t accomplish anything if no one is listening. Communication is the cornerstone for a positive relationship with your teens. Here are a few tips to start opening the lines of communication.

• Build Trust– When you give your opinion or ask your teen questions their first reaction is you don’t trust them.

Build trust early. Show trust by giving them some age appropriate freedoms. However, make it clear that if the trust is broken, freedoms will be taken away until the trust is rebuilt.

• Practice Honesty- At this age, adolescents develop their thinking skills. They are very aware of what you say and are sensitive to consistency.

If you say something and do another, they will recognize your actions as two faced. By being dishonest you will lose their respect and your ability to lead.

Every Day Parenting Tips

The first step is opening the lines of communication. Once that is accomplished, you should be better equipped to deal with the everyday issues that arise. Here are a few tips to build a positive framework.
• Encourage Activities for Personal Growth- Teens maintain a better attitude when they participate in activities allowing for personal expression. Extra curricula activities like art programs, sports or band help teens find value in themselves. Evidence has also shown teens who participate in community service engage in less risky behaviors and receive higher grades.
• Allow Teens to Have a Part- time Job It will teach them important skills for the future such as accountability, time and money management, the ability to communicate effectively and be on time.
• Build a Close Relationship– Remember, communication is key. Teens are persuaded by the people they spend time with the most. By spending time, parents contribute the most powerful impact on a child’s attitude, behavior and life approach. Form close bonds by making family dinners a time to connect. Talk to your teen about issues that are important to them such as school or their friends. Resist the urge to be a know-it-all. Instead, actively listen to their opinions and reflect what they are saying back to them so they are aware you value their thoughts. Teens with a close bond to their parents are proven to do better academically and engage in less destructive behavior.

OVERCOMING BASHFULNESS

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